You may be hurting.

When you were little, a band-aid and a kiss made the pain go away. Now, the pain is in your heart. The wound from an abortion can be jagged and deep. You need to feel understood — perhaps forgiven.

Let us help. We don't offer a band-aid or a quick fix. We offer support and the help of people who have been there and have experienced the healing process.

Deciding to seek help may be one of the toughest decisions you have made. But it may be one of the best.

Tana’s Story

When I was 19, I dated a man who said he would love me forever. When I told him I was pregnant with his child, he was very calm and understanding and told me he would “take care of it.”

At first I thought he meant he would marry me and support me through the pregnancy and help me raise our little child. Instead, he meant he would pay for an abortion.

At the time I felt incredibly angry with him, but went ahead with the abortion. I have never been the same. For years I hated myself and cried myself to sleep many nights. Sometimes I woke up to the sound of a baby crying. But there was no baby…only a sad, sad dream. I thought I was going crazy.

It took me seven years of suffering to get to the point that I was ready to get help. I found hope and healing through an abortion recovery group. There I shared with others who had many of the same problems I did. Together, we grieved the loss of our children, and worked toward healing. Although I still feel regret over my decision, I have been able to forgive and recover from the pain of the abortion. I hope you will read this card and reach out for help.

Self-Assessment

Read through this self-assessment to see if you have symptoms of post-abortion trauma. If the list reflects problems you’ve experienced since your abortion, and you feel stuck, you may need help recovering. They tell us abortion is a quick, painless answer to the problem of an unplanned pregnancy. We know, from experience and from research, that this is simply not true for everyone. Take a moment and read about some of the issues other women dealt with after their abortions. See if you identify with any of them:

1. Have you changed as a person since your abortion? What were you like before your abortion? How are you different now
   
   
2. If your sister or best friend were thinking about having an abortion, what would you tell her?
   
   
3. At the time of your abortion did you believe abortion was right or wrong?
   
   
4. Check the following problems that have bothered you since your abortion:

• I struggle with eating disorders.
• I find myself in abusive relationships.
• I’m having increased unprotected sexual activity.
• I’m using drugs and/or alcohol to distract myself from my pain.
• I often feel so sad that I can’t handle my responsibilities.
• I often think about hurting myself.
• I keep having the same nightmare over and over.

5. Do you shut down or feel numb when you ’re in a highly emotional situation?
   
   
6. Do you experience explosive emotions?
   
   
7. Has your relationship with God changed since your abortion? If yes, in what way?
   
   
8. Have your relationships with men changed? If yes, in what way?
   
   
9. Do you feel you must hide your abortion or your feelings about it?
   
   
10. Do you avoid people or situations that remind you of your abortion?
    
    
11. Did someone pressure you into having the abortion? If yes, what is your relationship like with that person now?
    
    
12. Do you feel like you’re all alone with the emotional pain you are feeling?
    
    
13. Are you interested in a support group for women who’ve had abortions to work through some of these problems?

Facts Provided By: Sometimes a Band-Aid Just Won't Do, ©2000, Frontlines Publishing, Grand Rapids, MI

Support

The loss created by an abortion often leaves an empty space in one’s life that never seems to be satisfied, even long after the experience is passed. It is normal to try to fill that void with activities, relationships, or even having children, but eventually the emptiness surfaces again along with feelings of guilt, remorse or bitterness.

We believe that the best way to overcome those disturbing feelings left by abortion is to face them squarely with the support of others who truly understand and do not judge or condemn.

Because there are many events in life that can damage one’s emotions and self-image, our post-abortion support groups provide healthy principles as tools that can be applied to any painful experience in one’s life. Our safe and confidential atmosphere fosters maximum personal growth and healing.

So, take the first step and call us (1-888-3-CHOOSE). One of our trained personnel will confidentially give you the information you need, and you’ll be on your way to healing and recovery.